A Short How To Guide On Developing Self Esteem
Developing self esteem can make you or break you when it comes to succeeding in life and society today as we know it. Those of us who are blessed with a sense of self worth and positive self esteem seem to have the world on a string and just seem to be able to pull off anything they put their minds to, while there are plenty of us who can't get out of our own way because we have a completely negative self esteem and feel like we are losers, we will never be able to do anything right or be a success in life, and no one wants to know us.
What exactly is self esteem. To define it literally is to say that it is the feeling of self worth that stems from a person's positive or negative beliefs about being valuable. We are all familiar with the feeling of negative self worth when you feel like nothing you do or say is worth anything and no one wants to hear what you have to say, or any of your ideas. Then you have on the flip side of the coin, the folks who are so positive about their outlook that they forge ahead and create ideas and take chances and excel at whatever they do because they feel positively about their own self worth.
Developing self esteem makes all the difference in whether you succeed in life or fail. Just how does self esteem develop anyway. Most often it has to do with parental influences in your life, whether your parents belittled you or praised you depending on their ability to show love to you, or maybe always were critical because you never made the grade in their eyes and were not worthy of their love. Or the flip side where they admired your accomplishments and you were the apple of their eye, which in turn filled you with a positive sense of self worth.
How powerful an influence is that; lives have been derailed and spirits trampled because of the way parents instilled positive feelings in their kids as they were developing self esteem. Or think of how you interacted with your siblings or your friends; did they make fun of you all the time or did they want to be around you because you were fun to be with and had a lot of great ideas. Another factor is whether you suffered with physical afflictions that made you the butt of jokes as a young kid growing up, or wearing braces on your teeth and you tried not to smile so no one would see them.
For some of us, developing self esteem is a large mountain to climb because if we are saddled with a negative self worth, we usually shy away from having or wanting much responsibility in any form, and we tend to miss golden opportunities because we are not actively participating in society so that the opportunities go right on by and we never see them. Many people with negative self esteem tend to have problems with setting and reaching goals, because they feel they are not worth anything, can't do anything right, so why bother. On the other hand, the person with feelings of positive self esteem is usually an extroverted person who likes to be in the middle of the action; feels very sure of himself, and feels he can accomplish anything he sets his mind to. As a result, these people are actively sought out by others in society which only adds to their feelings of positive self worth and buoys them up even more.
So what is the secret of developing self esteem. Is there something that can be done and how do we reach that point in our lives where we feel good about being ourselves and proud of our accomplishments. For one thing, be aware of what you say when you talk about yourself. Don't put yourself down, or talk in a belittling manner. That old adage of "you are what you think" also applies to "you are what you say". You call yourself a jerk often enough and soon the whole world within earshot of you begins to believe you truly are a jerk. Believe you are just as good as the next person and make that your mantra for every day comings and goings; look at yourself in the mirror every morning and say it out loud...I am just as good as the next person and I can prove it......and believe in what you are saying.
An integral part of developing self esteem is building up your self confidence and feeling good about just who it is you are. Start making small decisions here and there and stick by your decisions, do it over and over again until it starts to feel right and you can hear that little voice inside you telling you that you are doing the right thing, and keep going. Once you get to that point, things get easier and you will feel much more positive about your abilities and slowly the positive image you are trying to solidify will be there. Remember that you cannot please the whole world, and there will always be someone who is unhappy with what you think or do; but don't get worked up over it, keep on going and getting better and more positive and stronger, and soon you will feel very positive about being the person you are and who you are. Developing self esteem is not easy for most people, but it is so rewarding when it is done right and has a positive outcome.
What exactly is self esteem. To define it literally is to say that it is the feeling of self worth that stems from a person's positive or negative beliefs about being valuable. We are all familiar with the feeling of negative self worth when you feel like nothing you do or say is worth anything and no one wants to hear what you have to say, or any of your ideas. Then you have on the flip side of the coin, the folks who are so positive about their outlook that they forge ahead and create ideas and take chances and excel at whatever they do because they feel positively about their own self worth.
Developing self esteem makes all the difference in whether you succeed in life or fail. Just how does self esteem develop anyway. Most often it has to do with parental influences in your life, whether your parents belittled you or praised you depending on their ability to show love to you, or maybe always were critical because you never made the grade in their eyes and were not worthy of their love. Or the flip side where they admired your accomplishments and you were the apple of their eye, which in turn filled you with a positive sense of self worth.
How powerful an influence is that; lives have been derailed and spirits trampled because of the way parents instilled positive feelings in their kids as they were developing self esteem. Or think of how you interacted with your siblings or your friends; did they make fun of you all the time or did they want to be around you because you were fun to be with and had a lot of great ideas. Another factor is whether you suffered with physical afflictions that made you the butt of jokes as a young kid growing up, or wearing braces on your teeth and you tried not to smile so no one would see them.
For some of us, developing self esteem is a large mountain to climb because if we are saddled with a negative self worth, we usually shy away from having or wanting much responsibility in any form, and we tend to miss golden opportunities because we are not actively participating in society so that the opportunities go right on by and we never see them. Many people with negative self esteem tend to have problems with setting and reaching goals, because they feel they are not worth anything, can't do anything right, so why bother. On the other hand, the person with feelings of positive self esteem is usually an extroverted person who likes to be in the middle of the action; feels very sure of himself, and feels he can accomplish anything he sets his mind to. As a result, these people are actively sought out by others in society which only adds to their feelings of positive self worth and buoys them up even more.
So what is the secret of developing self esteem. Is there something that can be done and how do we reach that point in our lives where we feel good about being ourselves and proud of our accomplishments. For one thing, be aware of what you say when you talk about yourself. Don't put yourself down, or talk in a belittling manner. That old adage of "you are what you think" also applies to "you are what you say". You call yourself a jerk often enough and soon the whole world within earshot of you begins to believe you truly are a jerk. Believe you are just as good as the next person and make that your mantra for every day comings and goings; look at yourself in the mirror every morning and say it out loud...I am just as good as the next person and I can prove it......and believe in what you are saying.
An integral part of developing self esteem is building up your self confidence and feeling good about just who it is you are. Start making small decisions here and there and stick by your decisions, do it over and over again until it starts to feel right and you can hear that little voice inside you telling you that you are doing the right thing, and keep going. Once you get to that point, things get easier and you will feel much more positive about your abilities and slowly the positive image you are trying to solidify will be there. Remember that you cannot please the whole world, and there will always be someone who is unhappy with what you think or do; but don't get worked up over it, keep on going and getting better and more positive and stronger, and soon you will feel very positive about being the person you are and who you are. Developing self esteem is not easy for most people, but it is so rewarding when it is done right and has a positive outcome.
About the Author:
Eve Francis informs readers with topics such as improve self confidence. For more information on The Off Spring Self Esteem visit our site.
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