Enjoy the Process of Dating

By Alan Bentley

When you look at the process of dating, do you see it as a very lonely and long road, almost as a necessary evil? It's true that some enjoy this process, but others just want to get it over with and to settle down with somebody for companionship. Whichever way you look at it, you should try and live in the moment and not be too far ahead of yourself.

There's no point in going out and trying to find a partner until you have looked inwardly and analyzed your situation completely. It is not fair to bring baggage from a previous relationship to a new one, nor is it okay if your finances are generally in a mess and you don't know where you are going in life. Is your education complete and your career path clear?

Don't be ready to open the door and bring a guy into your life if you are not really sure where you are, yourself. Have a good look at your lifestyle and understand that you are what you associate with. By looking for a long-term companion through a process of dating you are essentially expecting somebody to become a part of who you are, so be careful.

The process of dating can mean different things to different people. To start off with, where are you going to "look" or rather make yourself available to see what happens. Will you resort to socializing at bars and clubs, are you going to hang out with friends and join social clubs or sports venues to see who you meet, or are you going to sit in front of the computer at night and surf through those online dating places?

A fresh start may be required if you have tried and failed with those traditional resources. Making this kind of start and turning over a new leaf could be just what your process of dating requires. Above all else, never try and force the situation to work for you.

Whether you are single or in a relationship, there are plenty of opportunities available for you in life. It is true that some cannot bear the thought of being alone, but think of the pleasures that you can engage in alone and compare your current situation to another.

To be philosophical, we must all realize that we are only here for a limited period of time. This time should be spent productively and we should live our lives as happily as we can. This includes taking everything in moderation and therefore moderate our thoughts and processes when it comes to dating. You should take the view that whatever happens, happens!

In life, above all never be too demanding and never be too keen to jump in without learning about your prospective date. The process of dating takes time and there is no shortcut. You may have learned already that unless you get to know the person very well, a long-term association is less likely.

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